welcome to my grave, where my thoughts come to die... i hope you brought a shovel! the dirt is still pretty fresh, but be warned of the bugs. and me rambling, and my overall idiocy, and... me just being a fucking edgelord (sometimes).
enjoy your stay!

my blog may contain: ranting about my daily life, photographs that i take, and,.... whatever else i feel like putting here. just dig around a little bit im sure you'll find something weird

^ the outside of this personal log ^

10/26/2022 6:00 PM
feeling: neutral...and hungry.
listening to: prayers for rain 2010 remaster - the cure

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oh my god. oh my GOD.

good afternoon blog, i am back once again to bother you...but for good reason this time!
my skelanimals jacket came in the mail today, it actually showed up a day early!!! which i cant really complain about. this purchase also managed to put me through the threshold to platinum VIP status with hot topic.. which is. apparently the highest status you can have there. (and really puts in perspective how much i've spent at hot topic this year, holy fucking shit.)

lol um,. so. THE JACKET. i am way way way happier than i expected to be with it, theres so many little details i either didn't notice or skimmed over when i bought it!!!

here is the jacket itself!! i got a 2XL because i feared it would be super small on me due to it
being womens sizing, however, i think it was the right choice to make! its just the right amount of baggy, without it looking massively oversized on me. the inside is very soft and fleece-y. it would defininetly keep you warm, which is good rather than it being unbearably thin. and if for some reason you get too hot, the sleeves are detatchable.,.. which was an amazing surprise. i saw the buttons when i was looking at the listing on the hot topic website, but i had assumed they were just for decoration not for practical use ^__^; though i do think i would prefer to wear it with the sleeves. speaking of the sleeves... god i was so happy. i was so surprised. in my post where i talked about purchasing the jacket i had wondered about thumb holes., ,,,, guess what the jacket has...

THUMB HOLES!!!!!! UAHAAHAHHAHA. i really was even tempted to cut holes myself if the jacket didnt have them
"pre-installed" lol. i just really really adore the detailing in this jacket. the red outer stitching looks AMAZING. i am such a sucker for stitching being visible on clothes, i actually own another skelanimals shirt that has white stitching on the outside, but i dont wear it all that often due to it being very form-fitting. though maybe i should start wearing it more, i really like the damn shirt. theres also a decal...? of kit on the front of the jacket, that has text under her saying "dead and cuddly"

so true, kit. you're just like me forreal!

and god. dont get me started on the zipper. i know its a weird detail to pick out, but i DIDNT REALIZE IT WAS SO COOL WHEN I PURCHASED IT.

look..... look at the heart zipper., the . oh my god. the only problem i see with it is that it gets tangled in itself easily? like the clasps holding it like to get caught, so just use caution trying to get it to sit right, i do fear breaking it off somehow.
and finally, the real kicker to this jacket. the hood itself. and yes i was aware of this feature when i bought the jacket, but damn that doesn't mean i can't still adore it.

THE EARS. the silly little ears oh my god. oh my goodness. oh my gracious oh my /........wow.
theyre a little floppy, but frankly i think i like them that way rather than them being stuck straight up all the time. the inside being striped too is SO NICE. and something great about the hood is the fact that its pretty big! its not like super up next to your head, honestly i've been looking for a jacket with this kind of hood for... ages. i never like wearing the hoods on my jackets or hoodies because they squish all my hair and my face and whatnot. maybe i just have a big head? but this ones really loose. its really silly... its gah. i love this jacket. i cant wait to wear it out, especially to the trinity of terror tour im going to
i think itll be really really nice ^__^

thanks once again for reading my nonsense, peace out and best wishes. im gonna go eat some pizza.

-jackary.......!

^ this is me in the jacket. no, i dont feel like showing my face again. ^

10/25/2022 3:49 AM
feeling: sleepy.
listening to: self-destruction - i prevail

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whats the point of a blog if i dont write in it. hello world, its me again. :-P ... i can definitely say that it has been one of those days, just, tired. even with a friend coming over to see me, i still feel tired like its some sort of incurable disease. i slept from 3am-1pm, took a 20 minute nap at like 6, and here i am at 9pm fucking exhausted. not in a physical sense, i could go run a mile in this body just fine. mentally though, im stuck in a fucking hole again.

lets not focus on that though. its only going to make me feel worse. what have i done lately... well. i spent an ungodly amount of money! that counts for something, i did end up getting tix for the trinity of terror tour, roughly $150 for two seats... i wanted general admission but they were all sold out and damn like i have some money but not THAT MUCH for resale. its gonna be a crazy show, i should have my hair cut by then... very cool very fun very scream and loud and bass pounding thru my bones (my boyfriend got us the VIP upgrades... damn you this was supposed to be YOUR gift [i love you so much im so excited LOL])

what else did i spend money on... i bought myself an ear gauging kit, finally i can dissappoint my dad the way ive always wanted to! im going to stop stretching them when i hit 0 or 00 i believe, i dont want them super huge. but ive always thought they'd look neat. especially either plain black plugs or getting pentagram plugs would be fucking sick. but this also means i need to pierce my second lobes at some point now ......ill consider it.

i hit up a goodwill and some other thrift store, got a shirt from each but only really like one of them. though i cant see myself wearing it very often, as an undershirt absolutely, but its a bit too... form-fitting for my taste. it fits just fine! i just strongly dislike the way it hugs my body. please let go.

^ said shirt ^

and while we're on the (hot) topic of clothes. i snagged one of the new skelanimal jackets that just dropped at hot topic i wanted the diego one really really bad but i cant find it now besides resale for $100+... x__x so i told myself i couldn't miss this one and seeing as i have diamond VIP status with this damn store it was worth it, i had a total of $15 in rewards so it honestly wasn't too killer on my bank account. skelanimals kit jacket you are mine now. it should be here on tuesday which is... oh shit wait thats tomorrow ?! nevermind. its thursday. which is 3 days away lol.

it has cat ears on the hoodie... and ......UGH!!! its so cute. i just realized it might have holes in the end of the sleeves for thumbs? i might scream if they do (in a good way) i just hope it fits well, i got a 2X because its women-sizing, and ive noticed from previous experience with hot topic that those shirts STICK TO YOU. they cling to every single curve like its going to die. hate that.

intermission for this funny ass pic i just found

moving on. what else did i spend my money very wisely on... some more minor things, a diego the bat decal for my car, a weighted blanket to match my new sheets, a bottle of dark vanilla cologne, a pierce the veil tapestry to replace my 5 billion vocaloid posters on my wall two (2) vials to definitely not put blood in... cause why would i do that.... a new lanyard, a cool pentagram necklace :-), and a new candle for my altar (its called snuggly sweater and it smells amazing.) and of course i went and got coffee like 10billion times because why wouldnt i.

i also impulse bought a phone charm from gummydropgems on instagram. i'll show it off when it gets here, but it has some really nice red and black beads on it, along with a skull and a pair of wings. (yes, i know. BOO INSTAGRAM! GET THAT OFF NEOCITIES! leave me be.)

fuck i . completely lost my train of thought here. i just spent 20 minutes doing fuck all when i should have been finishing writing this LOL. i guess i can end this post with two things.

first: i carved a pumpkin late last week, ummmm..... yeah, another like. hour has passed, ive run out of energy to write this. heres my pumpkin though, its little guys and they're in a cemetary or something.... under the full moon :3

sike. its 3:25AM and im back. i ended up leaving the house at around 11:30 to go buy ice cream from a 24/7 gas station. it was worth it, i think. butum. im tired tbh. goodbye for now.

-jackary.

10/20/2004 12:49 AM
feeling: hyper
listening to: helena - my chemical romance

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NEW HAWTHORNE HEIGHTS JUST DROPPED. it is just. delicious. absolutely delectable. i even tuned into their live for a second after it dropped, but didnt find much substance in staying. ever since i saw them at blue ridge rock fest, i've gone absolutely insane. of course of course everyone loves the silence in black in white, ohio is for lovers... (SO CUT MY WRISTS AND BLACK MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!) frankly.. before that show i was a bit of a poser. i had only heard ohio is for lovers, i had only gone to their set for ohio is for lovers. but as soon as it was over i had niki fm stuck in my head.. then it just. continued. "the silence in black and white" and "the rain just follows me" are HANDS DOWN my favorite albums from them. i want to see them again so badly, especially since i actually adore the band now...

i have become a bit of a concert junkie i believe, its all i really want to do is go to shows LOL. tomorrow im gonna score tix to the trinity of terror tour for my boyfriend and i. hes actually the one who got me into motionless in white, and i managed to get him into ice nine kills lol... <3 so. it works out
speaking of my boyfriend. its been. a while since ive updated my blog at all. and things have gotten,,way way WAY better. my last blog entry was on february 10th of this year... and seeing as its been 8 months since then of COURSE things would have changed.
(off topic. i just realized i dated this post 2004 and i really dont want to change it)
first and foremost, i graduated high school. which, hooray jack! most people do that! yeah. i know! BUT. its a little bit of an accomplishment when i didn't even think i was going to live to be a whopping 18 years old. that place was the literal bane of my existence. being around all those people, the constant dread of waking up that early... etc etc. but i have my silly diploma hanging on my silly wall. i got my mf drivers license, i BOUGHT A CAR. thats right. this webmaster owns a car x__X... i got my snakebites pierced, my dream piercing!!! and... i saw one of my dream bands?! a lot of bands actually. i'll write a proper post about my trip to blue ridge rock fest someday, but for now all you need to know is i saw pierce the veil. i saw them at their second show of their first tour since 2017.
i also fell in love with this total dork of a boy... we had kinda been..."talking"? since like... june. but i broke down and asked him to be mine on august 2nd LOL. i... think it was worth it. i genuinely have never felt more loved, and hes coming back to the state for good soon!!! im so excited to have my weird little emo boy back ...

*ahem* alright. enough with the cheesy shit. overall. life is getting better. and i say that alot, but i really really mean it this time. of course i still have my downs, i still have the days where nothing but the release of disappearing for good sounds like the best option. but! the future looks optimistic. i have a nice feeling about the years to come, the life ahead of me, the.... whatever lol.

i will leave you with some of my favorite photos that i've taken in the recent months, peace out.

-jackary.

^ the plebmaster himself. taken on my sony cybershot, drunk as fuck

^ creepy ass confession thing i infiltrated

^ my little hideaway in the woods xP